By Bint Salman
Appearances Are Deceptive:
She elegantly walked with her low-cut gown and long bare legs on the red-carpet. The glitter on her visage shone brilliantly as she threw smiles at the audience waving her hand up in the air. The golden crown on her head was her dream that had come true. Amidst the glamour and celebration, she felt her heart slowly sinking in, the vacuum in her getting larger, and happiness culminating in a strong wave of anxiety. Is that all she got after a long wait? she got everything she ever desired then WHY?…why is life so hollow and incomplete?
Tears trickled down her cheeks, she was lost but she couldn’t figure out why!
Days later she committed suicide..
The term beauty is quite flexible; everyone seems to have his own way of defining it. The beauty pageants organized every year may arrive at their tough decision of identifying the most beautiful girl from across the globe and crowning her for her ravishing outward appearance. But this is just a trivial matter of something which is apparent; the looks. What lies beyond those looks? A hidden horrible adulteress, cabinet filled with anti-depressants, tentative cuts around the wrist due to suicidal attempts, a state of constant unrest and apathy? For sure we don’t know. The fashion and beauty industry are muti million dollar industries, smartly exploiting women.Woman want to be in the rat race by either providing their services as fashion/beauty icons or by proving as the potential customers of designers from Haute Couture.
The tale of beauty and glamour which is so well-known today is nothing but an epic delusion; it’s so hollow and superficial.Instead of being influenced by it, you should relish walking in your own beauty that shines from your faith and obedience to the Creator.
Am I Really Beautiful?!
You should not consider anyone as a standard of beauty such as a certain celebrity or super-model. Do not compare your looks to those around, in this way you just end up hurting yourself more by feeling more dissatisfied about the shape of your nose, skin complexion, hair color or whatever it is. There is a huge diversity in the creation of Allah; each one of us is different and unique. The comparison only leads to jealousy, envy, frustration and disappointment. You can make the most of your capabilities, talents and excel in something you have passion for instead of wasting time in such comparisons which grieve you.
Whoever told you that you are ugly is either ignorant or heedless of the fact that Al-Kha’aliq: The Creator and Al-Mussawir: The Fashioner has created all of us in the best of form. In His Creation is the epitome of perfection. Allah says:
‘Verily,we Created man in the best form’ (Surah At-Teen – Ayah 4).
In surah Taghabun Allah says:
“He created the heavens and earth in truth and formed you and perfected your forms; and to Him is the [final] destination.” (Taghābun, 64:3)
Though He confers upon some certain blessings and keeps others from having those to test all. So we find some people indulging in disobedience of Allah through those blessings, thereby failing the test while others who are deprived of those blessings showing impatience and discontent also failing the test. The essential requirement of passing the test is profession of satisfaction and gratitude in heart and declaring: Alhumdulillah!
So, you have now a strong reason to be happy, bold and pleased with the way you naturally look even when you don’t have your make-up or lenses on.
Beauty Lies in the Eyes of Beholder:
Every person has his own way of grading looks, for some a heart-shaped face is more adorable, while others find a slightly long face with sharp features more exotic. In truth the eye is pleased with what the heart approves!
The fear of rejection and denial should not be fostered as it damages ones confidence, self-esteem and self-worth. There is a motivation factor for all those sisters who believe that they aren’t beautiful in the fact that ‘it is strength of conviction, good character, modesty and steadfastness which renders an everlasting and profound beauty. These were the qualities which adorned the most beautiful women who made history. Do we know any precise details of their shapes and curves? It’s only the details of their courage and the way they spent their lives in accordance to their conviction and relationship with Allah that adorned the pages of those books, and that every time we read about them we are taken by awe and get remarkably inspired arriving at a sensible conclusion that these were truly the most beautiful women that ever existed on the face of this planet.
Any woman who emulates these perfect role-models succeeds in becoming the most beloved in the sight of her Creator. After all, what more does a sincere believer desire than to be the best in the sight of the one she/he loves the most?. This thought itself is so empowering and brings multiple benefits:
-As a Muslimah fixes herself for her Creator and makes His pleasure and His love her ultimate goal in life she feels the deep void within her gradually filling up, completing her soul.
-As she finds her true purpose in life , the discovery opens doors of happiness and success in her life.She lives by the goal of spending her life in serviude to Allah, fills her heart with the love of her Master to a point that worldly attachments get minuscule and vague.
-She doesn’t crave for any na-mahram’s attention or compliments on her looks. She keeps herself from flaunting her beauty in front of those who try to take advantage of it by crowning herself with obedience of Allah through Hijaab. Her beauty keeps growing under the protection of this modest covering exactly the way a pearl is furnished with luster inside the covering of an oyster deep down in oceans and seas.
-She focuses more on beautifying her inner which doesn’t age, wrinkle or wither by time but will make her scales go down by it’s weight on the day of judgment.
Narrated by Abu Darda: The Prophet, peace be upon him, said: “There is nothing heavier upon the scale of a believer (on the Day of Judgment) than good character.”
Therefore, if you imitate actresses or super-models, you will never be able to achieve happiness and confidence, so discover yourself and be yourself.
The man who truly fears Allah values a fore mentioned traits in a woman and finds her beautiful irrespective of whether she has an ideal figure, height and complexion or not. So don’t worry he will love you for the way you are ( but that doesn’t mean I don’t encourage women to groom themselves and make an effort to look good for their husband, ofcourse they should within the bounds of sharia)
”O Allah! as you have Created my External Beautiful, Beautify my Character (inner) as well.”