Does it Break You or Make You?

never-lose-hopeBy Bint Salman

Listen up! all of you out there. Whatever be the nature of your distress don’t despair the mercy of Allaah, indeed His help is near. Allaah never intends to break you down, He wants to strengthen you, teach you things you would have never learnt if things had continued to run smooth ,refine your faith and do what is BEST for you in His own subtle ways. So rest assured, the matters of your life are in safe hands. Calm down, clear your head off from nasty thoughts , read this and rethink!

Oh Allaah why does it have to be like that?:

The moment Allaah issues His decree on us and we pass through events of catastrophic nature,many of us become hopeless and even faithless.Our spontaneous reaction on being tested or afflicted by a calamity usually is,we start questioning Allah, ”Oh Allah WHY? why did it happen to me? of all why only me?. This is usually phase one,followed by more phases. Let’s go through these phases and learn a few things, insha’Allaah.

In the initial phase, right at the onset of distress, Shaitaan comes with all the bad stuff and ideas,constantly whispering them to us and mainly through Shubhaat that is doubts continues to lead us in despair . Since we are in a weak position so like a perfect enemy Shaitaan makes his move and throws his arrows and spears . Therefore it’s here where we need real strength and Emaan to retaliate.

Allah says in Surah Baqarah – Ayah 155 and 156 that He tests His servants with fear, hunger, loss of wealth, lives and fruits and in the next verse He mentions the quality of His believing slaves by giving them the title ‘As sabireen’  (the patient). These are the ones who in their phase one, right after being afflicted say; “Truly, to Allah we belong and truly, to Him we shall return.”. Just ponder over the Emaan of these people,despite being distressed they immediately realize that Allah has given them everything and He has the power to take those bounties whenever He wishes.Therefore they show their contentment with Allah’s decree. This is ar rida anillah azzawajal it means to be pleased with Allah, to believe strongly that His wisdom is infinite and He does what is best for us and we’re not to question Him as He says in Surah Ambiyaah – Ayah 23: ”He cannot be questioned as to what He does, while they will be questioned”

Prophet (sal Allaahu ‘alaihi wasallam) said: “The greatest reward comes with the greatest trial. When Allaah loves a people He tests them. Whoever accepts that wins His pleasure but whoever is discontent with that earns His wrath.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 2396; Ibn Maajah, 4031; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Tirmidhi.

Therefore whenever any unpleasant thing happens to us we must patiently endure and utter innalillahi wa innailaihi rajioon and console ourselves by relying on Allah’s wisdom and the good that results from it.We should also make Du’aa to Allah to reward us in our patience and compensate the loss with something better; ”Allahuma jurni fee museebati wakhlufli khairam minha”. O Allah compensate me for my loss and give me what is better than it.

Under such situations there are people who suffer a marked decrease in their Emaan levels, they get so caught up in their grief that they miss their Salah,they turn lazy towards Deen and remembrance of Allaah. While Allaah says in Ayah 45  in Surah Baqarah: ”seek help in patience and prayer”. That is why our prophet (sal Allaahu ‘alaihi wasallam) would pray because it provides comfort and helps during mishaps and adversities. Salah establishes  a direct link with Allaah (Subhaanahu wa Ta’alaa) , it’s when u can talk to him, you can weep to Him as He’s always there for His slaves.

Hudhayfah   (may Allaah be pleased with him) said “Whenever the matter became serious the Prophet (sal Allaahu ‘alaihi wasallam) would pray. (Collected by Abu Dawud (1319) and others. Graded as being Hasan by Shaykh Al-Albani).

Exercise self-control by avoiding violence and self-induced hysteria:

Patience also entails that one remain as calm as possible on being struck by  misfortune and doesn’t inflict harm upon himself or others or the surrounding objects,which is the patience by body. Some people when misfortune hits them start shouting and tearing their clothes and get hysterical but later over a period of time they calm down. This is not patience in any way.

Once prophet (sal Allaahu ‘alaihi wasallam) was passing by a grave when he saw a woman who was doing what she should not be doing on death of her husband. So He (sal Allaahu ‘alaihi wasallam) told her ittaqillah wasbiri; ‘be conscious of Allah and be patient’. To this she said ;”turn away from my face for you haven’t been afflicted with a calamity that I have been,so he just walked away. Later when she came to know that it was the prophet of Allah (sal Allaahu ‘alaihi wasallam) ,she went to his house and told him that she didn’t know it was him. The prophet (sal Allaahu ‘alaihi wasallam) told her “Verily! patience is at first stroke of calamity.”

For how long will things be like that?

In yet another phase,when the period of affliction prolongs to months or years,we give up hope and stop our supplications all together. This is usually when Allaah’s help is just around the corner.

Let us strengthen our Emaan by taking guidance from the beautiful story of Yusuf (‘Alaihi Salaam) .It was revealed in Aamul-Huzn (the year of sadness) for the emotional and moral support of the prophet Mohammad( sal Allaahu ‘alaihi wasallam).So one can ponder over the verses of Surah Yusuf to get motivation and immense comfort, insha’ Allah. Yusuf (‘Alaihi Salaam) was a victim of maltreatment and abuse but it was His patience, perseverance and faith in Allah that led him from the darkness of well and gloom of the prison to a lofty status in Egypt. It was not merely a month but more than seven years of patience and endurance that yielded sweet rewards  and the  same brothers who plotted against him, went down into prostration before him, as a token of respect. Take lessons from Zakariyah (‘Alaihi Salaam) who turned old and his wife became barren yet he invoked hopefully by saying “… and never have I been in my supplication to You, my Lord, unhappy [i.e., disappointed].” [Surah Maryam – Ayah 3]

In the hereafter the patient ones will be taken to paradise without any reckoning while others will be terrified about their hisaab as Allah says in Surah Zumar – Ayah 10:

Say: “…Only those who are patient shall receive their reward in full, without reckoning.”

The term used here is Beghairi Hisaab, some  interpreters say Bighairi Hisaab means: the amount of deeds you’ve done in this life wouldn’t deserve the status that you will be in paradise .

In Surah Baqarah – Ayah 157 Allaah assures the Saabireen of His blessings,forgiveness,mercy and guidance.

Those who are patient are rewarded with ‘Maiyatullaah that is ‘the company of Allaah’ and ‘HubbAllaah-love of Allaah’ as Allaah says in Surah Baqarah and Surah Aal ‘Imraan:

”innallaaha ma’as saabireen – indeed Allaah is with those who’re patient.” (2:156)

” innallaaha yuhibbus saabireen – ‘verily Allaah loves those who’re patient.” (3:146)

Stop nagging people and complain to Allaah alone:

Many a times we keep complaining about our misfortunes to the people,rather in more accurate terms to the Created beings who would show indifference, no signs of mercy ,when we should be  approaching our Creator who has an infinite amount of Mercy for us. Therefore,when it comes to patience it applies to tongue also.One can be patient by his tongue by not complaining to other than Allaah and this is the meaning of Subrun Jameel, the beautiful patience. The prophet (sal Allaahu ‘alaihi wasallam) said when he was asked; “its patience by which you don’t complain” and of course the meaning here is we should complain to only Allah and not His Created beings as we see Yaqoob as in Surah Yusuf – Ayah 86. said: “I only complain of my suffering and my grief to Allaah”.

Just hold on to hope in Allaah and don’t despair:

If you’re being tested,so were the prophets,the righteous people of the past but they clung to their faith more strongly.Allaah says:

” Do people think that they will be left alone because they say: “We believe,” and will not be tested. . And We indeed tested those who were before them. “ (Surah Ankaboot – Ayah 2 and 3)”

No matter how your distress aggravates,just carry on,for it’s only disbelievers who lose hope in Allah’s Mercy.

”Certainly no one despairs of Allaah’s mercy, except the people who disbelieve.’‘ (Surah Yusuf – Ayah 87)

For how many years did Ibrahim (‘Alaihi Salaam)  hold his hope in Allaah when he prayed for a son ? Zakariya (‘Alaihi Salaam). too had to wait for a long time but they did not give up hopes in Allaah. So ask yourselves this question: ‘should I give up so easily?’

 

Supplications For Depression

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Supplications for Depression

Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah

In al-Saheehayn it was reported from Ibn ‘Abbaas that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to say, when he felt distressed:

“La ilaaha ill-Allaah al-‘Azeem ul-Haleem, Laa ilaaha ill-Allaah Rabb il-‘arsh il-‘azeem, Laa ilaaha ill-Allaah Rabb is-samawaati wa Rabb il-ard wa Rabb il-‘arsh il-kareem.” 

 Translation: “There is no god except Allaah, the All-Mighty, the Forbearing; there is no god except Allaah, the Lord of the Mighty Throne; there is no god except Allaah, Lord of the heavens, Lord of the earth and Lord of the noble Throne).”

And it was reported from Anas (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to say, when something upset him:

“Yaa Hayyu yaa Qayyoom, bi Rahmatika astagheeth.” 

Translation: “O Ever-Living One, O Everlasting One, by Your mercy I seek help.”

And it was reported that Asmaa’ bint ‘Umays (may Allaah be pleased with her) said:  The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said to me: “Shall I not teach you some words to say when you feel distressed?”

“Allaah, Allaah, Rabbee laa ushriku bihi shay’an.” 

Translation: “Allaah, Allaah, my Lord, I do not associate anything with Him.”

It was reported from ‘Abd-Allaah ibn Mas’ood that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:

“No person suffers any anxiety or grief, and says: “‘Allaahumma innee ‘abduka wa ibn ‘abdika wa ibn amatika, naasiyati bi yadika, maadin fiyya hukmuka, ‘adlun fiyya qadaa’uka, as’aluka bi kulli ismin huwa laka sammayta bihi nafsaka aw anzaltahu fi kitaabika aw ‘allamtahu ahadan min khalqika aw ista’tharta bihi fi ‘ilm il-ghaybi ‘andak an taj’ala al-Qur’aana rabee’ qalbi wa noor sadri wa jalaa’a huzni wa dhahaaba hammi.” 

 Translation: O Allaah, I am Your slave, son of Your slave, son of Your female slave, my forelock is in Your hand, Your command over me is forever executed and Your decree over me is just. I ask You by every Name belonging to You which You named Yourself with, or revealed in Your Book, or You taught to any of Your creation, or You have preserved in the knowledge of the unseen with You, that You make the Qur’aan the life of my heart and the light of my breast, and a departure for my sorrow and a release for my anxiety.”

“…but Allaah will take away his sorrow and grief, and give him in their stead joy.”

[Al-Kalim al-Tayyib by Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah, edited by Shaykh al-Albaani, p. 72]

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